Getting Caught, So Feared Yet Such a Turn On

This teen's favorite hangout (Flickr: sshb)
This teen’s favorite hangout (Flickr: sshb)

From my perspective, one of my biggest fears as a in-closet crossdresser is being caught by someone who notices the tiny speck of nail polish remaining on my finger which I thought was completely clean. That or she notices the strap of my teddy just barely bulging through the sweatshirt I wear over it.

Those were two separate incidents, with me out and about in the city, where I didn’t know the other person. I initially try to avoid, at all costs, any revelation of my feminine attire since it makes me extremely embarrassed. Yet I notice that, as soon as the “shame” subsides, I am left with a gratifying feeling.

Is this how an exhibitionist feels, I wonder? Yep, I think it does.

Actually I can recall one of my most unforgettable moments, exposed as a crossdresser, starting out as an embarrassing situation and leading to a rush of sexual tension.

When I was sixteen and confined strictly to a pantyhose fetish, I decided I want to try out lingerie to accompany it. This time I wouldn’t “borrow” anything from my sister or mom. This would be mine to enjoy all to myself.

So one day after school, I walked into a JC Penney at a nearby mall and headed straight for the lingerie section. I couldn’t stop trembling as I entered and browsed about. There were maybe two or three other women there who might have noticed me. I managed to gather myself together, though, and concentrated on the task at hand.

Then I spot the two-piece turquoise blue camisole and panty set that I couldn’t resist. I figured a size medium set would suit and made my way to the register, trembling again as I realize I am about to actually buy lingerie for the first time. However, I wasn’t prepared for what came next.

The cashier, a woman, greeted me warmly but as she looked down at the camisole set I had placed on the counter, she said three words with an unforgettable look of surprise that made me want to die right there.

“Is this yours?”

Deeply embarrassed and obviously made as a crossdresser, I tell her yes as I contemplate turning around and running for the exit. I stick it out though, finishing the purchase with what composure I had left and leaving the store visibly shaken by this time. At that instant, I felt almost traumatized by the experience.

But as I calmed down, I began to notice the embarrassment was actually a rush for me. Something like an extreme adrenaline rush mixed with sexual excitement. Whatever it was, it manifested itself into incredibly intense masturbation as I tried on the camisole and panty later that day.

So, if being exposed is so gratifying, why don’t I just do it more often? It’s pretty simple: the urge to prevent embarassment to myself easily outweighs the urge to expose my crossdressing even though the shame quickly subsides and gives way to stimulation.

I believe that one day soon, as with many others into crossdressing, that hidden side of me will gain more exposure, little by little. Why haven’t you notice the pantyhose through the holes in my jeans yet?

41 Comments on “Getting Caught, So Feared Yet Such a Turn On

  1. Yes I agree, so much like breaking though a wall. The incredible danger of someone discovering you and then the rush of admitting it to someone, almost as if you are proclaiming it for someone to hear. I remember buying a pair of pantyhose when I was about 17, all my other purchases were done with the intention of escpaing with only a brief moment of apprehension. this time, however, things did not go as planned, I selected 4 pair of pantyhose and moved towards the register after doing my usual reconnaisance of the store. I got to the register and the clerk was a young woman and I was like “ok this will be over in a sec” when she asked me if they were the right size and about how tall, how much did she weigh and I started by saying she’s about and inch or two shorter than me (they always are) and about the same… then I stopped and it was as if I needed to “come out” to someone I said clearly “these are for me, I love wearing them!” She gave me no trouble and said, “nice, you’ll look cute in them!” Ever since then I enjoy it immensely and most times nothing is said but if a comment is made I make it quite clear that they are for me and I will be wearing them!

  2. Thanks for sharing Charlie. I will make it my next mission “coming out” to the cashier with an armful of pantyhose and lingerie. Then tell about it here.

  3. Hi. I can’t even remember when I came out to the cashier the first time, but it was looong ago. Since that time I practically always tell sales persons that I’m buying them for me. I have this little talk with ladies where I ask for some suggestions. Once I even asked changed my hose in the store. I said that mine just got ripped and I heading for a “meeting” that’s why I need to change right now. Everything worked out just fine. So don’t be scared. Be yourself and try to act as confident as you can.

  4. I’m willing to bet that they see so many men buying pantyhose/lingerie enough that it isn’t a big deal to them anymore. I still love getting a rush out of purchasing in person though!

  5. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”. A famous quote that rings so true for crossdressers buying female items for themselves in boy mode or even more for those of us who venture out in public as our femme selves. What we do is not against the law in most places and there is no reason for us to feel guilty or ashamed for doing it! People sense fear and guilt and are much more likely to react negatively to it. Confident people are rarely challenged. It’s mostly about attitude. The feminist movement allowed women to present themselves in any way they choose while we men are still bound by arbitrary cultural stereotypes of what is masculine. We should be empowered to know that as crossdressers, we are at the forefront of male liberation! We have to accept ourselves before we can expect others to accept us. Wear your pantyhose with pride guys!

  6. Amen to that Lisa, although it is not always quite that easy to venture out into the public for a variety of reasons. However, it is a thrill once in a while!

  7. This brings back so many memories. I totally understand the rush that comes from being caught or exposed in public. In fact, it can be quite intoxicating and addictive. I’ve had so many experiences of purposely putting myself in a position of being exposed, from something as simple as a visible waistband to being “caught” in a semi-public location in something entirely inappropriate like a leotard and tights.

    I’m terrified of being seen by men, but it is so erotic to be so vulnerable in front of women, especially cute, young women of college age. The nervous giggles make me burn with erotic embarrassment.

  8. I love the trill of getting caught wearing pantyhose. I wear Pantyhose almost every day with either no-show socks, or no socks at all. I used to go out to the bars with my friends on Friday and Saturday nights. I always wore panties and pantyhose under my jeans (and if I felt really daring…I wore a Garter Belt and Stockings!), but never any socks to hide the hose. I really got turned on by the thrill of trying to get caught. I also liked to wear my women’s brown Two inch heeled sandals. My polished toes were 95% covered, but if anyone looked closely they would see my candy apple red painted toes peeking out behind the leather straps. I loved the two inch height advantage the shoes gave me, and with my long jeans no one could see the heel, . At least no one ever told me they saw them. I always got nervous when we sat down, because my pant legs would ride up exposing my sandals and hose. One night after a couple Heineken’s, I was sitting at the bar talking to a girl I knew. All of my friends had already left. I was talking to a tall leggy blonde named Sandy. Sandy was always dressed to kill in tight mini dresses, pantyhose and high heels. I used to drool over Sandy. She had the hottest legs. As we were talking, drinking and eating some bar popcorn, Sandy looks down at my crossed leg. I obviously was relaxed and forgot that I was wearing a garterbelt, nude stockings and women’s heeled sandals, and had crossed my leg’s. She smiles and then all of a sudden she reaches down and rubs my crossed left hose covered ankle. She giggles and says: “oh my god Paul, you’re wearing nylons and women’s sandals?” I immediately turn bright red uncross my legs and say “no! What are you talking about? Sandy said she thought my bare ankles looked kinda shiny, and when she touched my ankle she felt the hose. You are wearing women’s pantyhose aren’t you? I was caught, and I didn’t know what to say. Sandy had me cross my leg again so she could feel my ankle again. Are those Silk Reflections? Those are my favorite pantyhose! Paul, you wear expensive pantyhose! OMG, she exclaimed as she pulled up my pant leg…do you shave your legs? Busted! I turned 10 shades of red. Sandy kept rubbing my leg, and I instantly got a hard on…then she asked me if I was wearing panties too? I just smiled, and she instantly knew I was. Then all of a sudden her hand was on my thigh moving towards my crotch and she felt the Garters! Sandy gasped…you naughty boy!!! You’re not wearing Pantyhose, you’re wearing a Garterbelt and Stockings! She kept rubbing my legs checking out the garters and her hand started moving towards my swelling cock! My hand instantly grabbed hers before she reached my cock, because if she would have touched me I would have surely exploded! so she went back to rubbing my ankle, which really turned me on. My cock was starting to tent my panties and hose. And Sandy kept rubbing my hose and she knew it was driving me wid. She then asked again if I was wearing panties. To which I replied. “Um, Yea!” What kind she asked? I blushed even more when I told her a black silk thong. OMG Paul, I can’t believe you are wearing Silk Panties, a Garter Belt, Silk Stockings and High Heeled Sandals in Public! With your ankles exposed and I can see the garters through your jeans? I told her it was kind of a turn on. The thrill of getting caught. Are you wearing anything else? Now I turned even more red because under my shirt I was wearing a bra but because of the pattern of my shirt you couldn’t see it unless you really looked for it, or felt it. I was afraid to say anything but I could tell Sandy knew. She smiled and brought her hand around my back and felt for my bra straps. When she found my bra she grabbed it, pulled and let it snap. Busted. Paul, you are a naughty boy, or should I say girl? Sandy then asked me if I ever dressed up all the way? To which I replied “every Halloween!”. That’s next week she exclaimed! I know, I can’t wait I said. Sandy asked me if I did my own makeup? Usually, unless I can find someone else to do it. So Sandy volunteered. I’ll do your makeup. Are you sure I asked? YES, she eagerly replied!!! Wy don’t we go to my place now and we can practice. It was only 10pm, so I was game. She asked if I had a dress to wear? I have a couple I replied. AWSOME! Run home and get them and meet me at my apartment in 30 minutes. I’ll do your makeup and then you can give us a fashion show! OMG, what have I got myself into?
    We both got up and left. I ran home and quickly grabbed my “Amy Suitcase!” it had inside three different dresses, 4 skirts, 4 different wigs, two pairs of High Heeled Sandals, a cute white pair of leather Keds, dozens of pairs of Pantyhose and Stockings, a couple Garter Belts, two black Purses, a Makeup bag, Jewelry Bag, a MakeUp book, several copies of Penthouse Variations (with the Crossdressing Story pages flagged, and a couple of my favorite Crossdressing stories from printed out. Before I left I took a quick shower and shaved my legs and face again. I wanted to be perfectly smooth for Sandy. I quickly got dressed, putting on my sexiest black silk panties, black Garter belt, and black Silk Reflections Stockings. Rolling the Stockings up my freshly shaved legs is always a turn onI threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and drove to Sandy’s.

    Sandy opened the door and I got the shock of my life…she was there with her roommate Nancy! Nancy and I went to school together and had gone out eat and drink as friends between and after class several times. I had always wanted to date her but she had a boyfriend so we remained friends. I was really nervous with Nancy there and was afraid she would tell our other classmates that I was a Crossdresser. Nancy quickly put me at ease by telling me that Sandy had told her about me and they were both turned on about it. Sandy promised that she would never tell anyone! It was the thrill of a lifetime getting caught by Sandy and Nancy

  9. I got caught buying pantyhose by an older woman at a grocery store. I went to a local grocery store to buy some additional pantyhose that were on sale. I wore black pantyhose with my black thong waist cincher over it…as I love how it feels with the thong going up tight in my nylon ass covered by loose nylon sweats. I was buying Leggs Jet Black STW pantyhose and no one else was around….I walked up to the check out and it was an older woman. I handed her my item and she immediately looked at the package and at me and said “wow, a guy buying pantyhose huh…..are ya off to the office soon?” I froze for a second…then with no one else around, pulled down the one side of the sweats revealing my top thigh and ass a lil…with black pantyhose…and I said “yes I am, just as soon as I get home to get all ready, my boss requires I wear pantyhose everyday!” she was a lil awwwwee struck…wow that felt good to say and sexy !

  10. Love the comment to cashier….nothing like a little truth with a little fiction to mix things up a little

  11. Yes it’s nice to see a cashier, especially a women, responding sympatically with a smile…the face that they make when they discover that it’s our own pantyhose. I went back to buy other pair at the same store and told her that these pantyhose are very comfortable ;)…
    But some other cashiers look at you strangely…but i don’t mind anymore.
    I think I’ll look for reactions next time…I’m still a bit nervous when it comes to buy lingery

  12. Amy Lee…That is a wonderful story. I love “Getting Caught” wearing “My Bra and Panties”, all Lingerie is “Great to Wear” !!!

  13. I’ve been caught a few times in my panties and it is such a thrill. I usually wear my panties under my guy stuff when I’m out running errands cuz it feels so good. One time I wore some to a dentist appt for my cleaning and after arriving at the office I used the bathroom. I got called in and sat back in the chair and the lady cleaning my teeth who is usually quite chatty was very quiet and seemed distracted. So my teeth are done and she leans towards me and whispers “ You need to adjust your zipper because your purple panties are showing.” I turned beet red and quickly adjusted my zipper and panties and thanked her for letting me know about my problem. She said “ Happy to help. I hope you didn’t rip them because good panties are expensive.” I laughed and said “Don’t I know it. I’ll let you know next time if they’re ok.” We both laughed and I left definitely looking forward to my next appt.

  14. Paula, no I wasn’t wearing a bra that time but six months later at my next cleaning I was wearing my matching red bra and thong. When I sat down she said “All tucked in today I see.” and laughed. I laughed too and said “Yes I covered everything up better today.” She raised and eyebrow and ask “Everything? You wear more than just panties?” I laughed and said “Sometimes.”

  15. Bobby…Just keep up on wearing your Bra !!! To Me, Wearing My Bra is the “Most Important Part” of Being a “CROSSDRESSER”. “I Never Leave Home Without It”. I LOVE MY BRAS !!!

  16. I wear what I can when I can cuz the wife isn’t a fan of my crossdressing. But at least there are some more understanding ladies out there 😃

  17. Paula, We all have our favorite items to wear and obviously yours is bras. Mine was panties but its changed over the years to a long corset with built in bra and garters. I LOVE the feel of garters and stockings!!!! My dentist friend does too!!!

  18. Bobby…I will still take to my “Bra Wearing” any day of the week !!! I sleep in my Nightgown, wearing my Bra underneath. To me, there is no better feeling than waking up with my Bra on !!! (I LOVE CHATTING WITH YOU !!!)

  19. Paula, I know how you feel. I had a chance to dress up for an entire evening and then stay dressed overnight and it was so great!! Taking off my skirt and blouse and slipping on a silky nighty and lying in bed was so different and so exciting. Chatting with you is so fun!!!

  20. Bobby…I just received 2 Underscore Bras (Made by Playtex for JCPenney), They are “Almond Color” (Light Beige) size 46C and 46D. I am wearing the 46C Bra now as I talk to you. It is one of the “Most Comfortable Bras” that I have ever owned !!! They were $30.00, Buy one get one 50% off…A VERY QUALITY BRA TO ADD TO MY COLLECTION !!! (So Long For Now)…Paula

  21. You lucky girl!!! I’m going to look them up as soon as I send this. Tell me all about wearing it…did you wear it out or just around the house? What did you wear it with?

  22. Bobby; So far I am just wearing (My Bra) in my apartment. I will wear it when I am out and about tomorrow. Most of the ladies here know that I wear a Bra, and are O K with me doing so. I have a few questions for you: Do you have “Pierced Ears” ??? I don’t, but I love to wear Clip-On Earrings when I am alone (Not Married). I also get Pedicures, Do You ???…My toes are currently “Painted HOT PINK” FYI: My Sister-In-Law gave me my first Bra, She Said That I Needed To Wear One (I Am A Natural 46C/D) and Thanks To Her, I Am Now Wearing My Bra “Full Time” Paula

  23. Paula, I don’t have pierced ears or anything else pierced nor do I have any tattoos. I also wear clip ons when I can but not as often as I would like since I’m married. I don’t get pedicures but I do keep my toes as nice as I can and I wear clear polish a lot. Nobody knows I’m wearing it but me but its still fun to do. Wow thats wild that your sister in law gave you a bra. Was it a plain and simple one or something pretty with lace and a bow? How do you naturally have a 46 C/D breast?

  24. Bobby…The Bra that my S-I-L gave was just a plain Beige 0ne. I don’t know the brand (It ‘s tag was too faded). She also gave me a Pink Nightgown for Christmas last year. I HAVE ALWAYS HAD BIG BREASTS FROM “CHILDHOOD” ON, (They increased in size from Meds for Headaches). In March of 2001, I had a “Sinus Infection” And the Headaches have never gone away !!! How often do you wear “Your Bras and Panties ??? You can E-Mail me at: [email protected]…I Would love to “Chat with you one on one. Paula

  25. I would really like her to dress me in her sexiest underwear and nylons and wear them around her house for her to get a girlfriend for a while until she’s satisfied that I have a fetish for womans lingerie

  26. I started with my sisters when I was 9 and then dress up with them and masturbating with them on. I would love to pose for selfies in the ones I have for any number of women who want to see. have you ever done that before.?

  27. My mom caught me in her expensive panties and pantyhose. They didn’t fit well though. Mom was so sweet to buy me pretty panties and pantyhose in my size and showed me how to put on the nylons and wash my intimate attire.

  28. I love wearing pantyhose and women’s shoes and clothes and a couple of times as soon as my wife left for work and still in the driveway I was putting on a pair of her pantyhose looking out the window and everytime I was wearing for a good five minutes before she left and one time walked to the bathroom to pee after five minutes thinking she was going any second and she came back in the house and I had to hurry up and take her nylons off and throw over the curtain in the shower and she only was grabbing her purse in the kitchen and I hear the door close and I put them back on and walked to see and still in the driveway I put her heels on and was sitting in the living room in that and her dress watching porn and I always fantasize about her and her gf and me going to a bar out of town for her friend and we drank so much and smoked weed at the hotel and at five the wife says when do we go I am fucked up and I said I was too and might stay at the hotel and her friend said you just want to go to the porn shop five minute walk from the room and I said didn’t see it she laughed saying you were staring at it and they laughed and she gave me and wife two pills to help stay up for the bar and then she took some and in less than a half hour and another shot each and joint my wife asked what it was she had us take she was feeling different and still so drunk and she said it was a couple of fun pills cause I didn’t think without it and drunk you both won’t go to the bar and she laughed and said why not and she laughs and walks in the bathroom and comes out in just nylons and a sheer bra and top and said because it is a CD bar and my wife jumped up and said I would love to go and they said are you going and I said I don’t know and her friend said this is all I am wearing with a mini skirt the whole night and will take off my bra now if you go and I laughed and said ok no problem and she says sure and I said I will and she said but we all have to dress up like women and have a girls night out and I laughed with my wife and she gave us another shot and joint and wife said he wouldn’t and I said what do I get and her friend said you let us dress you like me and you pick her clothes and she has to wear no matter what and you can play with my tits when we dance and I said ok and she won’t and she said watch me and I picked out a very short skirt and a sheer body stocking and after they dressed me up I said she has to keep it unbuttoned then if she gets drunk enough undo it and she says right you won’t let me and I said scared and before we left we took two more x pills and within an hour at the bar she was so horny in the bathroom her friend said I have to dance with any CD or guy that asks me to and flirt with them and my wife said I have a rule and she says you can’t walk away or stop them from rubbing your butt or legs and I said what about my rules I get two since you both made one and I pulled out vibrating anal pussy and clit toys with remote and they said what about yours and I showed I have one we all put in each other and walking out that asked the other rule and I said anyone they dance with can rub anywhere on the outside of the pantyhose and you have to let them she said ok and wife said you wouldn’t be mad then I said let’s do a couple lines and back to the bathroom and they do one and I do two big ones and put two more big ones out and her friend did it and said damn I was already horny as hell this is going to make me grab guys to dance just so I can get felt up my wife said I know and says you know what is going to happen if I do that other one this soon and her friend says you have to and she said if we get one more rule each I said only if you do it now and she did and she said I have to rub under CDs dresses and I asked her friend her rule and she said I had to dance and sit next to her while she was getting felt up and I said ok then two hours before the bar closes invite some for after party and dancing just like here and we stop by the porn shop and dancing with her friend and us watching her get felt on her pussy through nylons her friend said she is loving it was I going to be ok with it tomorrow and I said only if you and us do this once a month and at the porn shop I want her to get my wife so horny and drunk and stuff she sucks a couple of guys and let her and me see them shoot on your tits and ask her to do a couple and asked me what she has to do to let her do two and I said I don’t know maybe see you after do some more for a while and she said only if she does as many as she does and I have to suck both of their tits after and I said if you get her to do ten and fuck two there and you do I will when she is on five you ask if I like seeing her do it and I say yes and you say suck your tits and she will do more and I do and when she gets ten I will beg her to do two more then whisper how hot I am seeing her open her nylons and lick and push her to the hole and lick while she is getting it and then the second one I whisper to her I have wanted this for a long time and will do anything to see her in the room with the guys fucking her all night while she is sucking at the same time and tell her I would love to do this all once a month together just like tonight and do things you both want to do that I would not only lick them clean everytime we do it but I would even suck cocks with you both and she is orgasming and asked and one by your self and we watch and let them cum on your face and I said I will do it and everything else they want to do if I can have them do this once a month and she says you want me to suck cocks and fuck everytime and I said yes More than you know and she said I don’t think you will next time you have us doing now and I said tell me how good your pussy feels right now getting it and she says I love it and would do it if you promise to do it for us and she said he stopped and I said he cum in you and to prove it to you I will kneel next to you and after you suck another and feel his cum squirt once in your mouth you can aim it at my face and jerk until it is empty if you will do everything I want and she sucked and grabbed my head pushing inches away jerking it and cum all over my face and I said this is to show you I will if we do this monthly and said let him fuck you before we go and she spread against the whole and I fingered her while she was fucked and she said just like tonight every month and I said yes sucking her nylon top tits with cum all over and she asked just to see me suck and fuck and I said everything the whole night and she said even dressing each other up like slutty girls and I said yes and she said you like it huh and I said yes and she said I promise but next time you will go without nylons and I rubbed her clit until orgasm and begged her please I want to wear nylons everytime we come she said ok but only if you suck cocks to get the guys ready for me the rest of the night and I said what about her getting fucked while sucking and she said just suck everyone who needs to get hard and then she will do the rest and I said do you promise we can do it monthly and we all wear nylons heels short skirts and tops and next time when we are here before the party I will suck one by myself and one with each one of you for every five you do and she said and next time you get what I said to wear your friend pantyhose she just wore the day before we cum up here and she said oh you want her pantyhose and I said yes and she said if you ask her and she says yes and you do what I say after that I will let you and she said yes and I said how often and she said anytime you want to wear just stop by and you can go pick out my nylons and I said even when we are home for weeks in between and she said yes and I said ok and then my wife said you have to let them cum all over your face and open your mouth wide and the nylons and jerk one in your mouth open so we can see it and show us then wait one minute before you swallow it and you can and I said yes I will do you want to she said I said I would love to do it with you both and dress up in nylons and be a girl with you both and I will let you both sit on my face and lick inside you both while you are getting fucked by four guys each and not stop licking inside you both until ten minutes after the last one cums in you and do everything else you want even let you both guide a guys dick in my ass while you both hold my legs open and just a hole in my nylons and sucking other guys at the same time I just want you to be a slut and I will be your pantyhose toy and she is cumming and says you promise you will I will loose my mind cumming from seeing you do that and I said I want you her and me to wear nylons and suck cocks and get cun everywhere on us and in us I will even wear them to your Christmas party Halloween party and have you so drunk and high on x that you go to the office with all the guys from your work and let them fuck you and suck them and I walk in to watch and see you getting it and you tell them that you want them to do you once a week at work and you will do it and give anyone a bj the other days if they buy you pantyhose and slutty clothes and one time I would love to get you drunk and you take a pill that knocks you out and let some people at the truck stop come in and out of the room all night and fuck you she said you are making me cum so much do you really want her to be a slut like that and I said I have only thought about you since the last time we had sex nine years ago how much I want to dress up like a girl everyday with you and watch you suck then fuck guys in front of me suck with you and some on my own and see you covered then filled with cum and I lick you clean and she says really you think about it and I said it’s the only thing I cum to since that day and have jerked off to the thought of you have been fucking and sucking guys behind my back I got so hot and I found a friend to dress up with like girls and she said did you then real fast before she can finish the sentence and was cumming I said yes many times in the last nine years and even have been sucking cocks and cum on my face nylons and in my mouth and I did it the first time since we had sex last drunk and high and was happy I had a place to dress up and someone to do it with that I was so horny I walked over got on my knees and sucked him through the nylons and he said do you really want to then I said yes and I would like if we can dress up together and just let me keep sucking your cock and I lick your cum shooting through your nylons and I will do it anytime you want me to just us wearing nylons and if you have cd friends I will suck them too and practice so if I can ever get my wife to dress up drunk with me and dare her to suck one and I will do what she wants and she will say I suck and I say after her and then I beg her to suck more for me to see I will suck for her if she sucks more then let them in her pussy and I will suck as much as she wants me to everyday if she does for me wearing nylons everyday together and she said OMG I’m cumming and want to see you do it I said I will do it for her every time she wants me to if she is a slut nylon wife and cumming she said yes I would love to everyday and you see me and I said I love her so much and she is my pornstar.

  29. My first “getting caught” event was probably my most memorable. I was about 7 years old. I was one of those boys whose mother dressed him up in tights as an infant/toddler. Back in the 70’s it was common for moms to do that. Boys & girls at a very young age are physically indistinguishable, aside from genitalia. But my pesky mind had a keen memory. With a younger sister and a family friend who was a girl, it was common to see them wearing tights. Also, girls in my class wore them. All kinds of bright eye-catching colors. It had been some years since my mother dressed me in them. I was now dressing myself in my usual attire. Since my sister was younger, her tights were too small to even fit me. But, one day my mother made a mistake and bought a purple pair that were too large. My sister didn’t like the outfit they matched anyway. So, they just sat in her drawer.

    One day, I was home with not much to do and my sister was over at a friend’s house. The idea popped in my head, to go seek out those purple tights. Mom was downstairs doing chores. I snuck into my sister’s room and got the tights. I took off my pants & socks, then carefully slipped on the tights. My “tactile” memory kicked in an instantly I remembered the feeling. Nice, snug, stretching caress. I marveled at the look of them on my feet and legs in the mirror. But then I heard the door open downstairs (my sister was back) and I quickly took off the tights, putting them away just in time not to get caught.

    But that experience enticed me to try it again. Another chance of being alone upstairs. I got the tights, put them on, and this time… well, I felt an erection. Now, I’d had them before. Of course at that age, the feeling isn’t tied to sexual use. It just happens, lasts a short while, then deflates. But this time with the tights, my erection felt different. A little more intense. I was distracted. And by the time I heard my mother on the stairs, it was too late. As she progressed up the steps, she called out my name. I answered “what is it?” And she asked what I was doing. I scurred to the back side of my bed, opposite from the doorway to my bedroom. I squatted down to hide the tights. She stood there. “Well? What are you doing?” She noticed my pants draped across my bed. Before I knew it, she had rounded the bed, as I tucked my legs under the bed. She looked at me, with a disgusted frown. “What… are you wearing your sister’s tights?” “I’m sorry.” “Take them off!” And I did, quickly, then handed them to her. She started to leave the room, but at the doorway she stopped. “These belong to your sister. They’re not for you to wear. They’re for girls. Don’t do this again!” I was humiliated.

    Well, what my mother didn’t realize was that she just upped the game and made it worse. The taboo effect was now in play. Also, the gender identification cemented. “Girl’s clothes,” not just a genderless garment. That really screwed with my head. Because I also felt this sexual association now. And well, you guessed it. A fetish started… and it would torment, haunt, and pleasure me for years to come.

  30. @Seamless Your last paragraph says it all. For better or worse, it created the path we went down.

  31. @Sheery
    Thanks — yeah, for better or for worse!
    There were times I tortured myself about it… thinking how different I’d have been if my mother didn’t trigger my fetish. But then, who knows really. If she’d been supportive, I might’ve still found them exciting enough to keep indulging in them. I chose that rationale to let go of any regret or latent anger.
    It’s really harmless. And in life, simple pleasures are a good thing. Worrying about what others think accomplishes nothing. I think I’ve got 30 pairs at this point… some as old as 20 years, because I take good care of them… better than some women I know! LOL

  32. @Seamless I always wonder what would have happened if my mother/sister didn’t trigger my fetish but oh well, that’s life.

    I also have a few pantyhose and lingerie 20+ years old. I like to keep them around for old time’s sake.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.